And Sovereign Oklahoma
BURNINGMAN 1999 : STATEMENT OF INTENTION
As you know, Woodpussy, in association with The Small Fireworks Close Proximity Effects Council, has spent countless exhausting hours bringing science and technology to the Burningman festival. Much of this selfless work was done by the CEO and General Manager of Woodpussy Incorporated, G. Don Wetumka. With much regret I must inform you that Mr. Wetumka has passed away at the age of eighty two from complications of dust pneumonia. Under direction of his last will and testament, Mr. Wetumka is now residing in tank number twelve of the Pawhuska Cryo-lab, frozen solid and waiting for his next big scientific adventure.
Those of us who knew him well were aware of his desire to move the Woodpussy operation into the aero-space field but budgetary concerns prevented this. Despite this knowledge, it came as some surprise that Mr. Wetumka's will legally binds Woodpussy Incorporated to take whatever measures necessary to launch it's deceased founder into deep space during the Burningman festival. The will also stipulates that a time capsule be made available to festival participants wishing to send personal items (photographs, dead pets, money, etc.) into the great unknown. Eager to meet our legal obligations and comply with the final wishes of our dear friend, we have begun drafting blueprints for what will be the first private launch and space burial during a large scale art festival. This having been said, please consider the following proposal drafted by Woodpussy's legal defense network for Burning Man 1999.
Thank you for your attention.
CEO/ General Manager
Between the world of men and transcendent Divinity there exists art.
Art is the will to truth made physically manifest - it is more than reality - it is a dialogue triumphant over Time.
Time is in the hands of God - chewing turkey or some cod - if you please.
Coinciding with the opening day of Burning Man, the science team at Woodpussy Inc. plans to begin building a ramp approximately sixty feet long and twenty feet high that will launch the rocket (already under construction) and enclosed time capsule at the appropriate angle to exit the earth's atmosphere directly over Guymon Oklahoma (Mr. Wetumka's place of birth). The rocket, coffin and time capsule are being constructed from the most durable of space-age polymers. The entire launch structure will be covered with class C fireworks on the day of the lift off. Twelve performers trained in fire safety will wear pyrotechnic helmets and costumes.
Soundtrack will be a combination of live and pre-recorded sounds by Woodpussy.
All fireworks will be common class C type.
All ignition systems will be fired electrically.
Woodpussy will again be working closely with Professor of Fine Art and pyrotechnician, Donald Evans
This will be Woodpussy's seventh large scale fireworks performance.
With the rocket already in place at the bottom of the ramp, pallbearers wearing patented Woodpussy Fireworks Helmets will seal the coffin/time capsule and place it carefully inside. Final checks will be made of all instruments and the countdown will begin. When ignition is confirmed, all helmets will be lit and the rocket will begin it's rapid trip up the ramp and into space. Pallbearers and other performers will circle the ramp as it burns in celebration of the life and death of our prolific former leader.
We at Woodpussy are aware that some skeptics have voiced concern about the dangers of such a complicated endeavor and the history of our safety record citing last year's oil drilling "disaster" as one example of "grand failure" and "endangering the public health". We admit that while a slight chance exists that the entire operation could explode in a huge fireball before it leaves the ramp, our science team seems "relatively sure" that the launch will be a success. If not, we apologize in advance.
Thank you for your time.
Testing is currently underway in a remote part of Indonesia.
All systems will be analyzed as well as ramp angle and thrust
before the entire operation is moved to the Nevada desert.
Sketch courtesy of Science Team member Paul Miller
The Woodpussy Science Team hard at work at
Small Fireworks Close Proximity Effects Laboritory.